Two car seats on my back seat

There are two car seats on my back seat.

My youngest child is 16 now, and here I find myself with 2 toddler car seats on the backseat of my car.

My beautiful, late model Mazda CX-5 that I bought for myself BRAND NEW because I could. And because I deserved it.

My beautifully branded car that replaced the people mover I needed when my kids were little and I was always taxiing them and their friends around, so we needed all the seats.

Making plans

This was NOT the plan.

To have toddler car seats again—not one but two—already.

It wasn’t my dream, to be a grandmother at 40. I fought it, hard. (How’s that for a futile battle?)

If you’ve read much of my stuff you’d know that one of my hardest journeys has been parenting and that babies are not my jam.

I struggled when my kids were little. Like, STRUGGLED.

And when these beautiful baby grandsons came, earlier than I had expected, it was a shock.

Adjusting our perspective

But the other day I pulled into my garage after dropping them back to their respective homes after a weekend at my house, I looked back at those 2 empty car seats, and I was proud of myself.

Proud of the grandmother I’ve become. Proud of my own parenting demons I’ve stared down. Proud of the way I’m contributing to their lives. Proud that I’ve stepped up.

And those two car seats become something I can glance back at and say to myself,

Shelly, you’re doing a good job.

It's one of the ways I've learned to feel compassion for myself - for today me as well as past me. It's one of the things I mean when I say,

Know yourself, so you can

Love yourself, and that's how you

Have power, and

Find joy.

What I want for you

I was at a new hairdresser's today and he asked me what I do, and I explained the rockstar writer-trainer to joyful badass keynote thing... It rolls off my tongue pretty easily these days.

But as I left I realised I could have simply said, I show people how to love themselves so they can be more powerful in their world.

Because I love me. And that feels powerful. And I want you to feel powerful, too.

How can you love yourself more today?

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Need a personal reminder of your worth?

I'm heading your way in November.

Grab your girls and some tickets for the Dairy Women's Network Roadshow!